"Speak softly and carry a big stick."

I have never been one for arguing. Conflict and I. . .conflict. However, when things get violent, it helps to be prepared. Theodore Roosevelt was quite right on this topic, I believe. Passivism will get you far, but not all the way.

Speaking softly does calm people down. I'm certain that's the reason that people croon to large animals when they feel intimidated. Apparently, if one stumbles across a large bear while hiking, one is supposed to speak softly and crouch down and appear small. This supposedly lulls the bear into thinking you're neither threatening nor large enough to be a meal. The same can be said for aggressive arguers. The wisest course to start on would be the wild bear approach: don't give them any reason to verbally attack or eat you.

However, occasionally the metaphorical wild bear is a metaphorically maternal wild bear. Mama bear will eat you to protect her cub. She dun care how scrawny or peaceful you are.

When one encounters outright, literal violence that it not symbolic in any way--when someone is ready to punch you in your fleshy nose--the wise course in this case to be threatening. I recommend martial arts.

I intensely studied the karate style called Isshin-Ryu over the summer. My sensei was a man who spoke softly and carried a big stick. He was quite short, and he liked to laugh and make people feel comfortable walking around the dojo in pajamas, barefoot. However, he was a weapon in his own right with a fifth degree black belt. He made sure that his students learned more than just hand-to-hand combat. We had to learn to use dual sai and a marvelous object called a bo. A bo is a six-foot long bamboo staff that you hit people with. Martial arts is my big stick. People find it quite intimidating and generally leave me alone after a roundhouse kick.

Hopefully, you will never have to unleash your big stick. It is wise to resort to the wild bear technique wherever possible. Speak softly and carry a big stick.